{"id":61,"date":"2018-11-15T05:04:10","date_gmt":"2018-11-15T05:04:10","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.jesus4lesbians.com\/?p=61"},"modified":"2018-11-16T15:57:26","modified_gmt":"2018-11-16T07:57:26","slug":"invitation-to-a-lesbian-vow-ceremony","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/Jesus4lesbians.com\/?p=61","title":{"rendered":"Invitation to a lesbian vow ceremony"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 I now jump forward to 1978.\u00a0 Two women in my parish that were very well known to me (let me affectionately call them Martha and Mary) approached me and invited me to join with a dozen others at their home in order to witness their \u201cvows of permanent friendship.”[i]<\/a>\u00a0 They asked me not to publicize this event since, for them, this was very private, \u201cWe don\u2019t want to share our love with those in our faith community who might find this unsettling.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

My mind thought of a Jesus tradition<\/h4>\n

My mind thought of the Gospel story where Jesus was invited to heal the servant of a Roman officer in the occupying army.\u00a0 Undoubtedly, Jesus did not agree with the brutality associated with Roman occupation; yet, since Jewish elders commended him saying, “He is worthy to have you do this for him, for he loves our nation, and he built us our synagogue” (Luke 7:5), he went.\u00a0 He went not to approve the Roman occupation but to respond to an authentic human need.\u00a0 He may have received flack for it later; yet, Jesus was accustomed to disapproval and didn\u2019t act to get the applause of others.<\/p>\n

Another Jesus tradition came to mind<\/h4>\n

My mind also thought of the Gospel story where a menstruating woman came up behind Jesus and touched the tassels of his cloak.\u00a0 According to the Jewish tradition, menstruation was no light matter.\u00a0 Leviticus makes it clear that any woman in this condition has no business touching anyone or she would instantly make them \u201cunclean.\u201d As for men, any man deliberately having sexual relations with a menstruating woman was to be sentenced to death (Lev. 18:19; 20:18). Yet, Jesus appears to have regarded menstruation much differently.<\/p>\n

Maybe his own parents, Mary and Joseph, already had a private opinion whereby they judged that the needs of others allowed them to override the rule of menstrual impurity.\u00a0 Mary, for instance, may have visited a sick friend during her period “because she needed her” and was quite confident “that God would understand.”\u00a0 In any case, Jesus does not upbraid the woman and use this occasion to enforce the importance of God’s commandments regarding menstrual impurity. The unexpected happens.\u00a0 Instead of contaminating Jesus with her \u201cimpurity,\u201d healing power flows from him to her.\u00a0 \u00a0He congratulates her saying, “Daughter, your faith has made you well; go in peace” (Luke 8:48 and par.).\u00a0 Jesus names her as \u201cDaughter of Israel\u201d and applauds \u201cher faith\u201d that made her well.<\/p>\n

This was not just an ordinary menstrual flow, to be sure.\u00a0 She had been afflicted with an unregulated menses for the last twelve years.\u00a0 In effect, she was a shut-in and unable to touch her husband or her children or her parents for that whole period.\u00a0 When she spots Jesus, she can\u2019t afford to speak or to be recognized by anyone who might know her. \u00a0She shouldn\u2019t be out.\u00a0 If discovered, she might be stoned.\u00a0 Her journey out of her home is nothing short of an act of desperation.\u00a0 She risks concealing herself in her garments, and she persuades herself that touching the fringes of his garment will go unnoticed.\u00a0 This is \u201cthe faith\u201d that impels her act of courage.<\/p>\n

Martha and Mary exchange vows as permanent partners<\/h4>\n

So, prompted by these thoughts, I accepted the invitation of Martha and Mary.\u00a0 When I arrived at their home, the couple greeted me warmly.\u00a0 I enjoyed meeting others who were invited.\u00a0 Most were already known to me.\u00a0 Their ceremony was simple.\u00a0 They emphasized that what they were promising to each other was not “marriage”[ii]<\/a> but a “permanent partnership.”\u00a0 They also mentioned that they were living in dangerous times<\/span> wherein they could be easily punished for what they were now doing; yet, it seemed to them that, after twelve years, there should at least be a few whom they trusted who could witness \u201cbefore God who they were and who they intended to be for each other.\u201d\u00a0 Accordingly, they joined hands and faced each other and promised an exclusive friendship and fidelity in sickness and in health for the rest of their lives.\u00a0 They then exchanged rings as “a visible sign” of their permanent partnership.<\/p>\n

During the rite, I imagined the fear and foreboding which Christians of the early centuries might have felt when they gathered together to witness marriages between free persons and slaves–a situation punishable by death according to Roman Law.\u00a0 The early Christians felt that, within the community, the distinction between “Jew and Gentile, freeborn and slave” (Col. 3:11, Gal. 3:28) had been abolished by Christ.\u00a0 Therefore, in their determination to serve God rather than men (Acts 3), they decided to witness and honor marriages of love which, in the eyes of Roman law, were acts of infamy.<\/p>\n

666<\/p>\n

[i]<\/a> They thought of themselves as exchanging \u201cvows of permanent friendship\u201d because, in this period, \u201cmarriage\u201d was not yet seen as a possibility for same-sex couples.\u00a0 These \u201cvows\u201d had no legal status.\u00a0 If I were to speak for them, what they needed was a sense that, in an antagonistic society, at least a few people knew who they were and what their intentions were for each other.<\/p>\n

[ii]<\/a>The language of \u201cmarriage\u201d was embraced because it would be advantageous to give same-sex unions an equal status before the law with heterosexual unions. \u00a0If this were not done, then every aspect of \u201csame-sex unions\u201d would have to be debated and voted on piece by piece\u2014income tax law, visitation rights in hospitals, adoption rights, inheritance rights, etc.\u00a0\u00a0 This would have taken years.\u00a0 To prevent this, all the rights of heterosexual couples had to be transferred whole and entire.<\/p>\n ","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 I now jump forward to 1978.\u00a0 Two women in my parish that were very well known to me (let me affectionately call them Martha and Mary) approached me and invited me to join with a dozen others at their home in order to witness their \u201cvows of permanent friendship.”[i]\u00a0 They asked me not to … <\/p>\n

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